Tiana's arrival had Kessa's mind going back to this morning's event. The thought of Pixie and Tiana's primitively hedonistic sexcapade sent her heart beating with pain and anger.

Over the years of working with Tiana, she knew she made the rules but expected everyone but herself to keep them. It was clearly stated in their contract no fraternizing with staff members and no employee/customer relationship yet Tiana took lovers from both sides.

If only things were like back then when Tiana was the spoilt and arrogant dictator that was her friend and not the lost broken woman that had broached her desires and pulled her heart out of its cage.

If only she had stopped running behind Tiana and cleaning her up every time life dragged her through the mess of her various mental break down she wouldn't be nursing a broken heart. No use beating herself up with "If only". The die was cast and she rolled a losing number. 

But seriously how could she have allowed this? Why when she knew exactly the type of person Tiana was she went allowed herself to fall trap to her charms, to let her flirtations and blatant seduction robbed her of her sensibilities? 

Tiana's heart belongs to her gym and her business to take the Sportswear Industry by storm. Love was never on Tiana's list of achievements. Yet she step off the precipice of rationality and fell head over heels in her feelings for a woman who was never going to commit to love.

Kessa stood behind the stall's door absentmindedly holding the makeup wipes she had taken her shoulder bag in her hand as she stared at her reflection in the mirror that was screwed into the partition of the stall. 

She took a deep breath and let it out silently as if her being as quiet as possible would help all her hurt disappear. A knock on her stall door had her crashing to earth as she was pulled from her sad thoughts.

Kessa stood ever so quietly and stared at the solid white door in front of her. Her eyes stared intently at the door and she involuntarily took a step back when another series of loud knocks vibrated off the door.

Did Tyra forget something?

Another knock followed by a familiar voice had her bumping against the toilet bowl sending the lid down with a booming thud. "Kessa I know you're in there please open the door." 

Tiana's voice come through the door and wafted over her like a snake charmer's flute. Her hand reach out to release the bolt as her mind screamed.

She came for me. She is not out there quiring the event of the photo shoot, she came in here to me.

The excitement was however short-lived as her mind dragged her back to the reality of their situation. Tiana was known for always getting her way. No doubt she was standing outside of the stall for her pleasure, not theirs. She doubt they shared mutual sentiments knowing who Tiana truly was.

Oh fuck Kessa thought to herself. I am not sure I can handle this! Why oh my God why? I can't deal with this.

"Kessa open the door I need to talk to you," Kessa heard Tiana say softly but the command was evident.

She wanted nothing more than to speak to Tiana. To have her clear away all her doubts as she grants her the desires of her heart. 

Her mind started to pool with uncertainties as she thought about what Tiana wanted. Had she come to tell her that her ultimatum was nothing but wishful thinking?

She should not have challenged her. Why had she allowed herself to get carried away? She best opens the door and holds Tiana in her arms and tells her how sorry she was and that she loved and forgave her, but she didn't have the strength.

Her hands reach for the bolt but her feet remained rooted to the spot. What if played through her mind and conjure up a million dismal reasons why it best she leave it be. 

Gawd how was Tiana able to do this to her? To reduce her to a pile of emotions without so much as trying. 

It was so irritating and amazing at the same time Kessa thought as she stared hard at the white door that separated them. Tiana had a way about her that could bring her to her knees and make her fall for her all over again.

 "I… I don't…don't want to talk to you ri…riight now," she stammered as she fought her emotions and was irritated to see that she was reduced to such a stage of cowardice.

The strength to stand her ground and not rush to Tiana cause her to lose control of her composure and before she knew it sobs rocked her body and tears ran down her cheeks.

"Kess? Kessa are you crying?"

The concern in Tiana's voice only set the floodgates flying and the tears to further break free.

"Kessa please open the door so we can talk," she demanded then said more softly up on realizing being forceful was not going to help. "I don't want to lose you, baby girl, you mean  so much to me." 

Kessa heard Tiana admit softly her feelings but still, she could not break free from her restraints and the declaration meant nothing it was still trivial. It was easy to want her around because she was the trusted friend the one who came to pick up the pieces whenever her defenses crack and life came seeping through.

Anger gripped her and her hand reach out to unbolt the door. Her finger gripped the handle and tugged the door open. When Kessa came face to face with Tiana her breath caught in her throat and all she could do was stare at the beautiful woman that stood before her.

Though her face was flawlessly made up and her thick hair was now straightened and combed in a side part to fall over her shoulders and lay against the ripped jean cropped jacket she wore over a mud brown body con dress that rested below her knee on her feet where brown Converse sneakers.

She was well put together but her eyes held a look that Kessa had never seen before. Was it pain? Hopelessness? Whatever it was did it constitute from Tiana's love for her or just her being inconsiderate and selfish as she was not getting her way? 

Tiana stared into Kessa's questioning eyes that pooled with tears before her eyes traveled the tracks her tears made on her face. Seeing Kessa like this broke Tiana's heart as she knew deep down it was because of her.

All she wanted to do was hold Kessa tight to her and kiss her tears and pain away and pour out her all into her being so that they both could mend but she knew Kessa wasn't ready for that. She was too upset to see reasoning and she was not sure she was able to convince her where she truly stand with her and her feelings.

Tiana took in a deep breath and slowly let it out as she looked deep into Kessa's eyes.

"This is not easy for me but believe me when I say I am so sorry for how I treated you, please forgive me. I have been fending for myself so long and getting my way with just a simple command that I forgot how careless and selfish I can be." Tiana said softly. "Please accept my sincere apology for the inconsideration of your feelings."

Kessa blinked shocked as she had not expected Tiana to ask for her forgiveness let alone apologize for what she did as Tiana had never apologized for her actions toward others.

Kessa remained silent her eyes still searching Tiana's trying to find out where this was going and if she was being sincere or just trying to get her to stop being mad at her. But she did not know Tiana to be fickle she was brutally straightforward and was never patronizing.

Tiana took a step toward Kessa causing her to step back further into the small stall. Kessa stood still and watch as Tiana's alluring aura permeated her senses and pull from her the captivating desire to let her guard down.

"Look baby I understand that you are upset, I said a lot of things I shouldn't have and I regret that, I realize that you owe me nothing when I gave you my promise and I broke it by being inconsiderate to your feelings."

Kessa had to fight the urge to push Tiana against the now close stall door that boxed them into the stall and pour out her need for her against her scarlet lips. Tiana was so overpowering and her need for her intensified.

"You mean so much to me in so many ways," Tiana told her. "I can't stand being without you, you are my backbone I swear I would not have made it through all the mental breakdowns if you were not here. I fucked up Kessa but please don't punish me by leaving me please." 

Was she dreaming? Did her wretched heart convince her feeble mind to play tricks on her? 

"Please kessa forgive me and come back to me you are the only one I want I have never felt so much love and care as when you are around and I want you in my life forever," Tiana said her voice hoarse with emotions as her eyes became misty as she looked at Kessa.

"Kessa just know that I will never treat you like that again I don't ever want you to feel like I take you for granted, you are a very valuable asset to the gym and you are very special to me" Kessa heard Tiana admit after a moment of silence between them.

Kessa felt her lips begin to tremble she wanted nothing more them to rush into Tiana's arm and take what she was offering but she already came to see what whirlwind desires had caused. She push aside the temptation to wrap her arms around Tiana's neck and make her surrender known with kisses of love and devotion, but she wasn't ready for that just yet.

It took everything in her to finally speak without her voice cracking, her feelings were spreading through her like wildfire. She wanted Tiana so bad but she didn't want to give in so easily and allow Tiana to feel that she could treat her any way she wanted and that she would always come running back.

"I need some time," she said trying hard to not succumb to her need for her lover. "You really hurt me Tiana you got upset when you realize I slept with Tim when you left me for days without anything but an empty promise I honestly don't believe that wont happen again when your beloved gym and your clothing line need your attention I want no need to be your priority too.

You know how you make me feel you know what you do to me and yet you made me feel like a toy that you just used and put aside until the need for me arise again. I won't be an option. Maybe Pixie and your other bedfellows may agree to that but I need love commitment and respect and I won't have that until you face the demons that turn you into the broken self-centered dominating woman you are. I want Tiana Persephone West, not some two side coin that will constantly flip her persona or my place and position in her life.

However, know this Tiana am here to fight for you and ride or die with you but not at the expense of false commitments and empty promises. I give you all of me, the good and the bad so no pretenses for me. It's only right you give me the same. I won't be your lavish side piece and I won't share or compete with others or the gym for you and your affection."

Tiana her face looking bleak but understanding looked at Kessa and nodded. It was evident she understood what Tiana lamented, "I get it Kessa. But have dinner with me tonight."

Tiana nod her head in denial she had to let Tiana learn a lesson that in their journey to love it was never going to be her giving Tiana and only what she wanted to take from their relationship. There were going to be compromises but not at the expense of her true desires.

"I am extremely tired. I finished the photo shoot with Tyra and I still have to finish my day by taking care of my clients as I am still in the bind to finish out my contract before I leave Total Wellness, but I do accept your apology. But as of right now, I need my space. I have a lot to think about so let me do my job." Kessa said doing her best to stay emotionless and indifferent as she looked at Tiana.

Her heart bled with pain as Tiana nodded and sighed softly before saying "Take whatever time you need, I will be here waiting for you when you decide to come back to me."

Dammit Kessa silently screams. This is the part where you fight harder. Not just take it as it is. Why the hell are you so stubborn to love without boundaries that you are not the one who put them place?!

Little did Kessa know that Tiana was not giving up. 

Kessa was like water and air to her she needed her to breathe and live. She realized that much now as she couldn't bare the thought of losing Kessa in either sense whether it was her leaving the gym or not being with her ever again. She was going to do everything she could to make sure that Kessa didn't leave and that she made her feel special every day and realize she was ready to finally face her demons so she could freely love her as she deserved.

Kessa who stood only inches from Tiana was only a second away from losing the battle of remaining indifferent to Tiana as her desire and need to love Tiana was so overpowering.

She wanted to beg her to talk to her bare her soul to her please baby when you are ready to talk come see me and I will always be ready to listen but she just stood there. The choice had to be Tiana's.

Tiana sighed again before saying, "Ok Kess well I'm gonna get back out there I have some things to take care of with Terrence and Dakota," but what she really wanted to say was, I want to make this better and hopefully fix the damage that I have caused.

Tiana turned and open the stall door and walk away leaving the door to the stall open. Kessa watched her silently screaming for her to stay and maje things right here and now but it was not until the stall door swung shut that she gave in to her feelings which immediately brought her back to the point of tears.

Kessa felt her heart begin to ache as the next several minutes passed and Tiana was once again away from her. She knew she needed to stand strong for herself and not succumb to falling prey to her feelings. She could not allow herself to be 100 percent reliant on Tiana even though deep down inside her heart she still loved and wanted to give her everything without reticence. 

Kessa stared at the door for a few moments and then reached out to bolt it. If only she could lock herself away from her feelings. She took the wipes she was still holding and pull one from the packet and wipe the tears and the makeup from her face before changing into her clothes.

She shook her head and said aloud as she slipped her feet into her Reboks. "Gawd that woman really fucks me up inside." 

Tyra who had returned for her phone which she had left in the other stall had heard enough of the conversation to realize that there was a kink in Tiana's armor after all. The Ice Queen was like every other Ice Queen you just had to know what to use to melt her.